Tag Archives: An Idiot’s Tale

Say it Ain’t So!

28 Oct

Yesterday I’m scrolling through my rss reader when I come across a post by good ole Mr. Dubs. It seems  he’s decided to call it quits on the k-blogging scene because of some threats he received from alleged Korean netizens looking to rid the peninsula of  ESL teachers who stray from the pack of conformity. In other words, Mr Dubs said some shit they didn’t like on his blog, An Idiots Tale, and now they’ve threatened to rat him out to his employer. Because I can no longer link to the specific post here’s some exerts from the comments he received:

I am the member from an organization of concerned Korean to clean up ESL industry…

…I think you should be very careful from now, as some member want to find the school where you work to tell about your blog…

You have wife and children, you should respect. You know about Korea right? You know it is danger to use internet in irresponsible way. If many Korean see this blog, it can be a danger for your future and family…

At first the old man shrugged the off the threats and kept doing his thing, but now after possibly receiving more threats, he’s decided to pull the plug:

The internet is anonymous. So the guy who made this evil promise might actually be a white dude pretending he’s a netzien.

Who knows?

If he is Korean, his anger is ironic.

I have the most pro-Korean blog on the peninsula.

I enjoy living on the peninsula. Plus I’ve always had a healthy affection for Her people.

Shit! I married a member of the tribe.

I think my twisted love-affair with the ROK comes through strongly in my blog.

But let’s face facts. Netziens are crazy bullies who have literally driven people to suicide.

Furthermore, I have a family. So I can’t take these threats lightly.

It would be different if I had the talent of Ernest Hemingway. Then I would have to continue writing for the good of mankind.

But I don’t possess that type of skill. I’m just an entertaining hack killing time between classes.

I have no right to put The Dragon Lady and The Children of the Rice in jeopardy over a stupid website.

Some of you might call me a pussy. And maybe I am.

But there’s no way in fucking hell that I want to face the ire of the Korean internet community. They’ll rip poor old Mr. Wonderful a new asshole.

I’m scared. Plain and simple.

Nobody is more saddened by this sorry state of affairs than me.

However, all things must come to an end.

And I’m afraid it’s time to kill An Idiot’s Tale for the well-being of my family.

I’m not 100 percent certain. But I don’t see any other option.

This isn’ the first time something l this has happened in Korea. So Why do I bring this up now?

For starters, as a journalist I’m always saddened when a fellow scribe gets pushed around to the point where it becomes dangerous to keep writing. Angry comments are one thing , but threatening a man’s family is crossing the line.

Secondly, I’d like to point out that while Mr. Dubs talked a ton of shit  (garnering friends and enemies alike) I would never say that he had an “anti-Korean” blog. There’s far worse shit being written by Korean haters who have been here for years. Hell, just drop by Daves ESL Cafe and read some of the malicious statements being slung around the forums comprised of nothing but grumpy expats. It’s downright sickening. Sure Mr. Dubs picked fights with other expat bloggers but he kept things cheeky in regards to Korean affairs–correct me if I’m wrong.

Lastly, this is a good time to give a heads up to newbie or would be bloggers in the R.O.K. Keep your scribblings tight my friends. I’m not encouraging you to sensor you shit by any means–fuck that–but know that if you post even slightly controversial material, and someone gets a hold of it at your job, there could be consequences. Again, If you got something to say, don’t be a punk, say it and own it, but know that there’s risks involved. This is not a game for the faint or weary people.

I can’t speak for Hagwon teachers, but if you’re teaching for EPIK, there’s a specific clause in your contract that prohibits you from making defamatory statements about your school or the people in it. I’d hate to think that this could include a sarcastic or cynical anecdote about a crazy day at work, but this is Korea, you never know. I recently was faced with a dilemma where someone at my school read my blog and took offense. I was able to successfully defend my writing, but it could have easily gone the the other way. And I’m not trying to scare any potential bloggers out of posting  their critical thoughts on life in Korea. A great number of blogs out there are as harmless as they come. I only mean to inform those bloggers who choose to walk the line. As a friend of mine said recently, Freedom of Speech is one thing, but Korean sensitivity is something totally different.

As for Mr. Dubs, if you’re truly calling it a wrap, you will be missed homie. I didn’t always agree with your point of view, but I did appreciate the laughs and your anecdotes about life on the rice paddy. Some may call you a pussy for kicking the blog to the curb, but as far as I’m concerned there’s nothing wrong for wanting to do right by your family. The internet is a hellish place and there’s no telling what these freaks might do. I fear for my dreads even now, and my shitty blog garners no where near the amount of traffic yours did. Anyways take care of yourself old man, and we’ll be waiting for your return, even if it’s only to shoot the shit.

Ciao, and Blian Golden Balls to you as well.

Kimchi Dreadlocks

P.S. To the stupid fuckers who sent the threats, Korean or otherwise, kindly do me a favor and fuck off. You’ll never get rid of us all.

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A Thanks is in Order!

10 Sep

A few days ago one of my favorite K-bloggers dropped a link to my blog on his site. His name is Mr. Wonderful. Now some folks can’t stand the man, and really, they have good reason. When he’s not dropping lines on how fucked up the U.S. economy is, or giving us a look into his (un)interesting home life, he’s usually talking shit about other bloggers in Korea or stiring up controversy with his satanical rants. That being said, I’m addicted to his blog. Even before I arrived on the shores of the R.O.K. he was the first stop in my RSS reader. Why? I like his writing. He has a simple format that seems to work for him and the more he beefs with other bloggers the more traffic he stirs up. I’m not jocking his style, but rather saying I’m a fan. Many a reader has first loved and then hated Mr. Wonderful. Me? I’ll give him props for writing bullshit and making smell it like tulips in the spring time.

But I’m not here to stroke the man’s cock! Instead I just want to give a proper thanks, and to offer a response to his seemingly well intentioned advice.  He says I need to cut the length of my blog posts and present more action and less thought–the old “show don’t tell” approach to journalism.

Here’s the thing. While this is something that would rightly piss me off any other day,  I’m not offended one bit. I got all type of posts from friends on my FB page advising me to tell Mr. Wonderful to kindly fuck off. Normally that would be my strategy, but I respect my elders; my mother wouldn’t have it any other way. Plus it’s not like the man found me out on the playground and called me pussy, looking to jack my milk money. And even if he did, he linked to my site and traffic went through the roof. I didn’t have to pay a dime. Furthermore, I wouldn’t want to pick a fight with a vet, even if it’s just for heightened blog stats. The literary spanking he gave Jimmy of Strange Lands is proof that the man knows his way around the yard. In fact Mr. Wonderful might have been trying to drop a compliment on your dear Jaywoodseyo. You’re not getting soft on me ole’ boy are ya?

That being said, Dreadlocks on the ROKS is my sandbox homie. I’m too damn cocky (read critical) about my writing to be hell bent on changing up my style. As I continue to post my shit will either get better in time or putt out once I’m low on juice. My point? I’ll be writing regardless of the outcome, and when my time in Korea is said and done, I’ll save it to show my youngins someday. You may preach the gospel brother, but on my blog, I’m a slave only to my editing. I do plan on posting more often,–I finally got the internet hooked up in my apartment–but when it comes down to it, I got a life to lead as well. Unlike some of these other wanna-be -journalist-user friendly-bloggers here in Korea (you know the type I’m talking about Mr. Dubs), I don’t post about every nook, cranny and shit hole I travel to. Sorry, too busy enjoying my time.

I like your style champ. You got a format that works, you’re unapologetic and I think you might even be a football fan (my Vikings took an ass whoopin today from Brees and his hooligans), but I’m gonna keep doing my thing the best way I know how for my readers. I’m not out to get famous like you brother. I just want to tell good stories.

So without further ado: Thanks champ. I can’t promise a damn thing in terms of how my posts will change (other than they will be more frequent from now on), but I always welcome advice from other writers. We’re a dying breed right? Take care of yourself on the rice paddy and I’ll hold things down in Busan.

Ciao,

Kimchi Dreadlocks

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